Following the negotiations was simply frustrating

Before going to COP and hearing from people that had already been there and warned me that it was going to be intense, frustrating and just a lot, I thought to myself „Can’t imagine it’s going to be that crazy!“ –  I was wrong. Now that a few days have passed since coming back my brain still feels messy trying to sort out the experiences and impressions of the last week. To keep it short, COP for me was a lot of things. Following the negotiations, and that has been said by a lot of people many times, was simply frustrating. Hearing them seriously discuss whether the 1.5° target should be kept alive while listening to the personal stories of people already very affected by the impacts of climate change was simply unbelievable.

At the same time COP, or more the people outside of the negotiating rooms was inspiring as seeing the effort of small initiatives, individuals and other actors made me feel like being part of a bigger effort. On a personal level, seeing all of the inaction once again stirred up the question of „What can I do in my daily life, personal choices and actions to not feel as helpless or sometimes like a hypocrite when not being 100% strict all the time?“. But somehow even writing this makes me a bit angry knowing that it shouldn’t only be on us to feel the responsibility of trying to fight this. What made the whole week easier was being part of an amazing group of people that I knew were sharing the same or similar attitudes towards a lot of topics and were also struggling with similar things.

I feel like it will take me a while to fully figure out what this experience has taught me but I am sure that I am grateful for having been given the chance to be part of this group and this experience!